The Invisible Gaps That Stall Leadership Growth

Episode #388 The Invisible Gaps That Stall Leadership Growth

Most leaders don’t struggle because they’re bad at leadership.

They struggle because leadership is one of the most complex jobs on the planet; but people are expected to just… figure out.

No training. No playbook. No feedback loop.

So if you’ve ever thought, “I don’t know what I don’t know”, that’s not self-doubt. That’s the system working exactly as designed.

The Leadership Exposure Problem

Leadership is the only critical job people step into with zero formal training (well, maybe parenting too?).

Most leaders learn by mimicking  what they were exposed to.

If your previous bosses were average, chaotic, or absent, that starts to feel normal. If you were micromanaged, there’s a high chance you’ll become a micromanager yourself.

The danger isn’t just incompetence. It’s false confidence.

I worked with plenty of executives over the years who were super smart and great in their technical field, but they were awful leaders. Their teams were inefficient, underutilised, and unmotivated. And they didn’t even know that’s what they were doing.

When “Fine” Hides Your Biggest Blind Spots

Here’s what’s interesting: most companies are surprisingly resilient to poor leadership, bad decisions, and an underutilised workforce.

Stability and predictability can mask inefficiency.

Leaders confuse absence of problems with presence of excellence. The classic high-performing team is widely thought to be a team where there is little conflict and widespread consensus on most issues.

This couldn’t be further from the truth.

Teams adapt to weak systems quickly. You don’t feel pain until scale, external pressure, or change exposes it. And many organisations are insulated from competitive forces, so any decline into underperformance won’t be immediately obvious.

Let me give you some concrete examples:

Many leaders won’t hold someone on their team accountable when they don’t perform. They’ll ignore it, rationalise, and make excuses for them.

Equally, they may not be strong enough to keep their talented jerks in line. Or to say “no” to the irrational thought bubbles that their boss has, which somehow result in more work for the team.

Often, they’ll let the team dictate the tone, the pace, and the standard, rather than setting those conditions themselves.

Just because your team is delivering something, and there aren’t a lot of skirmishes for you to referee, doesn’t mean your leadership is effective. And it doesn’t mean the team is performing anywhere near its potential!

You Can’t Replicate What You’ve Never Seen

Most leaders feel a little uncomfortable in some of their key areas of leadership. They may struggle with conflict, or find themselves hesitating on big decisions.

If your boss was a command-and-control leader, who relied purely on the power of his title to push his team into action, then you probably wouldn’t want to adopt  that style.

But what tends to happen is that people replicate the leadership behaviours that they’ve seen, and that feel reasonable. The really keen ones even read a few books, or listen to some leadership podcasts.

They often build the motivation and inspiration to be better, without actually understanding what that looks like in practice.

The Invisible Gaps Most Leaders Miss

So let’s get practical. If you’re thinking “Okay… what might I actually be missing?” here’s where to look first:

Clarity on how to generate higher performance from the team. You’re working hard to deliver the wrong things. There’s no clear understanding of what “good” looks like.

Decision quality. You’re either avoiding decisions or over-consulting…equally bad. You’re confusing consensus with performance. And you’re not realising that indecision causes hesitation and damages confidence.

Accountability mechanics. Clarity in your mind isn’t enough. Accountability has to be crystal clear. You’re letting standards gradually slide. You’re rescuing instead of developing.

Operating at the wrong level. You’re doing junior work as a senior leader. You’re feeling indispensable instead of effective. That’s just burnout disguised as commitment.

We’ve got a free Blindspot Test where you can get a rating for each key area on where your leadership blindspots might be, which you can take here.

The Long-Term Cost

If you never close these gaps, you’ll just get stuck.

Your career plateaus without any obvious reason. Chances are your boss isn’t a great leader, so you won’t get timely, targeted feedback. They’ll just tell you you’re doing a great job. And when they don’t promote you, they’ll either tell you you’re too valuable in your current role, or simply say, “Better luck next time”.

Your team will always seem underdone. Performance will be mediocre. You’ll be frequently blindsided by unexpected problems. Your team will miss important deadlines with no warning. In the worst cases, people will become entitled and uncooperative.

You’ll feel constantly tired, but not as though you’re achieving anything meaningful and worthwhile. There’s little innovation or discretionary effort.

Most leadership failure isn’t dramatic. It’s slow, quiet, and invisible.

The Real Issue

Maybe the real issue isn’t “I’m not a good leader.”

It’s “I’ve never been shown what “exceptional” actually looks like.”

Leadership is a profession, as much as being a doctor or a lawyer. But with the lack of training, mentoring, and direction, it’s really not treated like one.

There’s no shame in not knowing how to lead. But there is in not trying to improve.

The best leaders stay curious. They don’t get defensive. They just do what they can to get better, and don’t shy away from the work that would make that possible.

I’ve got to tell you, I never felt completely comfortable. As a student of the human condition, I was constantly evaluating how effective I was in different situations, and coming up with ideas to improve my performance.

And I did everything I could to fill the gaps. I read all the leadership and business classics. I attained a high quality MBA. I remained constantly curious.

But there are still times when I’m sure I don’t know what I don’t know.